8 ‘Unwritten Rules’ of Being a Bartender, According to Reddit

Being a bartender can be a tough gig. It’s long hours on your feet, late nights, and near-constant interaction with other people — intoxicated people, at that. Luckily though, no one knows this better than fellow bartenders, most of whom have established a secret set of rules to guide behavior at not just their own bar, but every bar they visit in their free time as well.

These silent rules were recently discussed in a post on the r/bartenders subreddit when user baranade posed a question to fellow bartenders: What do you think are some unwritten rules behind the bar [or] when you go to another bar that don’t get mentioned enough? Are there any things that someone who has never worked behind a bar might not know that would help them out if they’re feeling out of place?

Naturally, the bartenders of Reddit had a lot to say. From the truth about Skinny Margaritas to when it’s appropriate to actually go behind the bar, check out eight unwritten rules of being a bartender, according to Reddit.

Never snap your fingers at, or otherwise interrupt, a bartender.

It should go without saying that interrupting anyone — let alone by snapping at them — is an extremely rude thing to do. If you need something from your bartender and notice them talking to another customer, wait for a few moments. If they’re not occupied with another guest and don’t appear to be occupied with another task, don’t just snap at them. Try to make eye contact first, and if that doesn’t work, an “excuse me” should suffice.

User anyd commented:

“There is NEVER an appropriate time to snap your fingers to get someone’s attention.”

User papacooldown11 commented:

“If you snap, shout, or Interrupt while I’m talking to another guest, you’re waiting at least 5 mins from that moment for any further acknowledgment.

Me wrapping up a transaction: “so you guys enjoying your trip blah b… “HEY CAN I GET A JACK A COKE AND A IPA”…

Nah man you can read the room and try again, ain’t a place or culture or world where interrupting 2 people doing business isn’t considered rude and annoying af.”

Don’t talk about being in the industry if you won’t act like it.

It can be tempting to talk about the industry you work in with others who also work in said industry. But if you’re going to mention that you’re also employed as a bartender, you gotta act like it — think of your ideal guest, and then be that guest. Respect your bartender’s time, don’t be too demanding, and tip well.

User jofijk commented:

“I usually won’t tell anyone that I’m service industry until after I’ve paid and am ready to leave. The only exception is if they pick up on it based on what I’m ordering or if the conversation leads to them asking what I do.”

User Bellydancer_045 commented:

“Don’t go out of your way to mention that you are a bartender if you’re not going to tip like one”

No one’s actually really making ‘Skinny Margaritas.’

The Margarita is one of the world’s most popular cocktails, and one version people can’t seem to stop ordering is the Skinny Margarita. Only no one, bartenders and guests alike, can really agree upon what a Skinny Margarita actually is — hence why this Redditor reports having so many sent back. According to Bethenny Frankel, who popularized the drink, a Skinny Margarita is Patrón, Cointreau, and lime juice, a.k.a. a Margarita, as this user correctly identifies.

User Locke562 commented:

“When you ask for a skinny margarita we’re probably making you a regular margarita. Too many skinny margaritas get sent back.”

Don’t mention the last time you saw a guest.

When a guest comes in regularly, it’s only natural for them to develop a rapport with the person holding court behind the bar. But as this Redditor points out, it’s probably best to refrain from mentioning the last time you saw them in person, especially if they’re accompanied by someone else. While we don’t condone behavior that will get anyone hurt or in trouble, you might be opening a can of worms that you’d probably prefer to keep firmly closed.

User xmeeshx commented:

“Don’t mention you saw anyone at a specific time. “Oh man I haven’t seen you since last Tuesday” (when they were with their mistress)

Discretion is part of the game.”

You probably shouldn’t put your phone near anything that gets served to a guest.

When making drinks for guests, hygiene should be at the top of the list of priorities. As such, a bartender’s phone should always remain far away from anything that goes into a glass or will ever be near a guest’s mouth. And on the topic of cellphones, bartenders should probably refrain from filming TikToks behind the bar while on shift.

User bluesox commented:

“Don’t lean your phone (that you use on the toilet) against the straws (that go in people’s mouths) to film a TikTok nobody is going to watch anyway.

Also, if I come in and you’re slammed or a big rush comes in, I’m limiting my order to two ingredients or less.

Also also, ‘behind’.”

Never go behind the bar unless you’re actually on shift.

The space behind the bar should always be reserved for those who are not just employed at the bar, but actually scheduled to be working behind that bar at that exact time. If you are not employed at the bar — don’t attempt to go behind it. If you do work at the bar, but you’re not on the clock — don’t go behind the bar unless you receive an explicit ask to do so. Bartenders are busy people and the space behind the bar is tight. Give them room to do their jobs.

User Pfazko commented:

“You don’t go behind a bar where you don’t work….

Do not use the garnish trays as an olive bar”

User Far_Pass8038 commented:

“Even if you do work there, you don’t go behind the bar unless you’re working.”

Don’t critique the work of other bartenders.

This one should go without saying. There is absolutely no need to critique other bartenders, even if you wholeheartedly believe they’re doing their job terribly. Simply put: Don’t be an asshole. If you don’t like a drink the bartender made, don’t drink it. If you don’t like the behavior of a certain bartender, don’t go back. It’s really that simple.

User steli0_k0ntos commented:

“If youre drinking somewhere else, don’t comment/critique how another bartender makes their drinks, unless its to say you love it. Not your cup of tea? Don’t order it again or dont come back.”

If you get a drink for free, tip the amount the drink would have cost.

Determining how much to leave in gratuity after receiving something free of charge can be tricky. A good rule of thumb is to still tip 20 percent on how much the bill would have been, but for bartenders who receive a drink gratis, it’s probably best to take things a step further. Rather than leaving 20 percent of what the drink would have cost, tip the full amount. Not only is it a nice way of saying thank you, but it acknowledges the kindness that was extended in giving it to you for free in the first place.

User BitFine8586 commented:

“if you get a drink comped unexpectedly tip the price of the drink that you were gonna pay anyway”

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